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Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Top Ten Signs Barbra Streisand's Gone Nuts
  
When a fan shouted, "Sing 'Memories'," she beat him to death with her high heel
Declared jihad on Liza Minnelli
At conclusion of "The Way We Were," bites off the head of a bat
Turned down an offer to save 15% on car insurance by switching to Geico
Invited Mel Gibson to come over and watch "Yentl"
Now believes that people who need people are only the third-luckiest people in the world
When a cameraman accidentally photographed her from the wrong side, she shot him with a 12-gauge
Refers to James Brolin's "Transmission needing work" if you know what I mean
Finally had a nose job -- to make it bigger!
Well, this is her fifth farewell tour
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