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Friday, February 16, 2007

Top Ten Signs Your City Is Too Fat
 Top Ten   
Town's fire hydrants spew Cheez Whiz
Majority of 911 calls involve people stuck in doorways
People only vote because they're hoping a Twix bar will fall out when they pull the lever
All the Streets named after cakes; all the Avenues named after pies
Town motto: "Are you gonna finish that?"
When Al Gore's in town people ask, "Who's that skinny guy?"
Elevators have maximum occupancy of 1
Townsfolk still talk about summer of '53 when somebody ordered a salad
Every night on the news, the top story is a bridge collapse
Officially changed name to Fat-Ass-Achusetts
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