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Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Top Ten Signs A Baseball Player Is Too Old
 Top Ten   
Gets winded putting on his socks
Hard slide into second triggers life-alert pendant
While playing outfield, yells at teamates to get the hell off his lawn
When buying performance-enhancing drugs, gets the AARP discount
Claims he killed President McKinley with a line drive
Often begins sentences, "As Shoeless Joe Jackson once told me..."
He's almost as old as the hot dogs -- seriously, have you ever eaten one of those things?
Lost part of his career fighting in World War I
During interviews, he thanks the Lord and the makers of super Poligrip
When he's in the on-deck circle, asks bat boy, "What did I come in here for?"
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